So as I thought my number would grow, it seems only a little over a thousand people like my blog.
I am thinking I need a life coach to make my dream of being a slightly interesting, foul mouthed, occassionaly funny and super hot blog author come true.
So after continuing my investigation I have found that I am in desperate need of a life coach. You will not believe what these people can do! They can help you make your dreams come true.
I contacted one of these lifeblood mentors of zest and vitality and asked them if they could make my dream come true and they said "Here's how powerful we are. As your Life Coach, we'll help you discover what's really most important to you in your life." I said, "Damn you're good. I already know what's important to me." "Then we'll help you design a plan to achieve those things. We'll work with you to eliminate any obstacles or blocks that stand in your way. We'll partner with you all the way to success. Then we'll celebrate with you!"
I said, "That's great. What do I need to do?" "Well, Kim, what are your dreams and we'll get started." I said, "I want to be a center in the NBA." Total silence. Now, considering that I am a 5'3", white woman with limited athletic ability you might think I am setting my goals a bit unrealistically, but according to their website, no dream can go unaccomplished. So ... everyone in unison ... start yelling. "Live, Live, Live I say."
What a load of crap. I want to coach these people to jump straight off the nearest cliff. Where do these assholes get off?
I had a life coach tell me once that my time would be better spent ant farming or masturbating than writing on this blog. I'm wondering if he's right! Who Does That?!
